A Little Book, So Kids Can Feel Ready

Think about how much of a small child's life simply happens to them. They get buckled into the car without knowing where they are going. They get walked into a new classroom and left at the door. They get handed to a relative they have met twice. Most of the big moments in a little kid's day were decided by someone else, and often we forget to make sure they understand what’s coming.

Just last week I told my 2 year old I’d take her to a pool and when it was time to get ready she went to the back door (it was about 55 degrees out) and asked if we could also put the slide in the kiddie pool when we played in the yard. I forgot to explain that it was a big pool at a place we haven’t been to in a year with a lazy river and fountains and a public bathroom…so many new things!

Before I was a photographer, I was a teacher. Fifteen years of it, a Master's in Teaching, and my National Board certification in literacy. I spent my days learning how kids of every temperament and ability actually experience the world, and one thing became clear over and over again. Children do so much better when they know what is coming. A first day, a fire drill, a field trip, a doctor visit. When we tell the story first, a big unknown becomes a little more knowable, and a child who feels ready can relax and simply be themselves.

Teachers and therapists lean on a gentle tool for exactly this. You make a little story about something new a child is about to experience, so they get to walk through it in their mind before it happens. I used these all the time in my classroom and with my own kids. And now I’m using a story for kids in my photography business that can help kids in a new, unfamiliar moment. A new place. A new person. A big camera. A lot of surprises.

I wrote a book to share with families and schools and also have it available for photographers to edit to make their own (their own photo/camera/lights if they use them).

I made this book with my friend Carrie Buonadonna, who holds a Ph.D. in Special Education. Between her expertise and my years in the classroom, we could build something that is warm on the surface and genuinely sound underneath. Every page is written from the child's point of view, in plain and gentle language, and quietly grounded in how kids truly take in something new. It looks like a sweet little book. It is also doing real work.

Here is the heart of it. When a child walks into a session with no idea what to expect, the unknowns pile up, and sometimes they freeze, or cling, or fall apart. That is not bad behavior. That is a young person who is in a new situation. My Family Photo Day helps them be more comfortable. It shows them who I am, what my camera looks like, that their grown up stays close the whole time, and that there is no wrong way to be themselves.

And this is the part I love most. When you prepare the littlest person in the room, everyone else settles too. A calm child means a parent who is not bracing or over directing. Everyone can relax more. So the family can feel more like themselves, more playful, more snuggly, more THEM. So then the photos will really reflect who they are.

I made this because I believe children deserve to be met with care, not managed. Every family I photograph receives this book before our session, so their child can feel ready and honored, exactly as they are. And because I know it helps, photographers can make their own and share with their own families too.

Kids are not something to work around on photo day. They are the whole point. When we reflect on the world through their eyes, they show up as themselves, and there is nothing more beautiful to photograph than that.